Who Is Raising the Children?

THE WORLD IS DIFFERENT NOW.  

Some things become obvious when you start to see clearly.

Obvious, but not easy to look at.

My 94-year-old father-in-law recently came to live with us for a few months. He’s seen a lot of changes in his lifetime.

There are a few things that rile him up. He’ll often lament: “I can’t understand what people are thinking!”

This is especially true when he looks at what is going on today with our children.

(“Our children” refers to the children of our nation and our world.)


Angry girl in need of manners training

get your free list of good manners here!


THE FAMILY CAME FIRST.

My mother-in-law (who left this world in 2015) was educated to be a teacher. She worked part-time as a bookkeeper, but her priority was caring for her family. 

Make no mistake, all was not “picture perfect” in her home—nor in the home in which I was raised—but priority was given to the needs of the family as a family. 

Family wasn’t merely a collection of persons orbiting a common address.

As a family, priority was given to:

  • Mealtimes together
  • Gathering for birthdays and holidays
  • Leisure time together (playing games, doing artwork, riding bikes …)

SOMETHING PRECIOUS LOST.

The question asked by this dear 94-year-old father and grandfather is profound. 

Who is raising the children?

My husband drives to work in the early morning and sees infants bundled in car seats on their way to daycare.

Let’s be honest. Although some mommas have no choice but to return to work after their six weeks of maternity leave, others do have a choice. 

COUNT THE COST.

I remember a conversation I had with one of the women who worked at the law firm I managed years ago. She was struggling, conflicted, torn because she wanted to be home with her children … and wondered if it might be possible.

After all, she observed, with the money she spent on restaurant lunches, work clothes, professional haircuts, fake nails, a second car, fast food in the evening, and child care, how much was she really contributing to her family by working?

She asked an insightful question….

THE WORLD CHANGED, BUT I CHANGED, TOO.

Unfortunately, at the time I was childless, unmarried, unsaved, and I didn’t understand her conflict.

In fact, one of my worldly role models at the time was a woman who stayed home but hired a nanny to assist with childcare so she could have more “me time” and focus on important issues like weight loss.

The world looks so much different to me after walking with Jesus for 30 years.

Thanks to Jesus transforming my perspective, luxury looks like:

… gazing at my baby while nursing him in the still of the night …

… being present as his brother takes his first steps …

… filling the house with the smell of homemade bread while my family putters around on a Saturday morning …

The “little” things. 

But many women are being unknowingly robbed of these great treasures.

NOW THEY’RE GROWN.

My sons have since grown into men.

Today, luxury looks like watching them complete their college education online, begin a career, start their own family.

I’ve savored these family days because my job has always been to prepare them to fly

My firstborn flew a few weeks ago. Now he’s a married man.

I’m so grateful I can answer my father-in-love’s question: “But who is raising the children?” by saying, “I am. And we are.” 

My husband and I accepted responsibility for that great privilege.

DON’T LET OUR CULTURE ROB YOU.

The privilege of raising your children is yours and yours alone.

Make the most of it while there is still time. Prepare them now for the world they’ll face tomorrow:


Angry girl in need of manners training

get your free list of good manners here!


10 thoughts on “Who Is Raising the Children?”

      1. I have heard many women say that they could not stand to be with their kids all day. It blows my mind and makes me sad. I work very part-time and beat myself up because honestly, money is tight. Then I remind myself that this must be where God wants me now and I only have 4 precious years left until my son graduates. My most important job is teaching him and I think I am doing a pretty good job!

        1. Thank you for investing in your children’s lives, Kimberlyn. We are all blessed by your efforts!

    1. You’re welcome, Melissa. Thanks for taking the time to share. Blessings on your family!

  1. Thank you for the confirmation. I’m nervous yet excited to embark on this homeschool journey with my kids. I love them so much and can’t imagine sending them off to the public school system especially with how crazy things are in our society.

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